A Walk Through Scum Valley

It was December 2007 when I got the call. Mom, my sisters and I explored all holistic possibilities to save my sister. She was 34 years old when throat cancer silenced her life, leaving her starved, and a skeletal semblance of who she was. I lost my dog Carter, a Great Dane a month before. I watched helplessly as he slowly hemorrhaged on my floor after making frantic calls to friends to help me take him to an animal hospital. An accidental cut on his foot revealed a clotting disorder. I wrapped his body in the quilt my Aunt and God Mother Ramona gave me. She died a few years earlier from a botched medical procedure. Her warmth and tender touch was all we had as kids, all that connected us to humanity. It’s times like this that raise the question of why bad things happen to good people. Growing up, I’d stomp my feet in a fit crying, “Not fair! It’s not fair.”

Pain comes often, like an unwelcomed visitor. Bringing a variety of excruciating flavors in circumstances that make us question life. Question God. I’ve read many books and articles on the subject that intellectually addresses the question of suffering but never really silenced that why.

Until I read something that bought it home this week. Zechariah 13:9. And I will bring them through the fire, and will refine them as silver is refined, and will try them as gold is tried. Here’s the answer to why we suffer - the mystery of glorification. A work God does in his kids to transform us into His image. A painful purifying process, where life breaks us down through hardships and removes impurities and weaknesses.  God compares us to silver and gold, it’s how precious we are to Him. But like those metals, we’re full of it. Sin is the waste mineral that can only be removed by fire. God, the Almighty Refiner. A Refiner who patiently hovers by the fire watching our sufferings. We’re never alone because He never leaves our side. Won’t risk his treasure alone in the flames. If you ask the Refiner how he knows when the dross is gone, he answers. When I can see my reflection.

We have a promise. He will bring us through the fire. And in the process, God says "Behold, I am making all things new."